DIARY FOR THE SOUL: ENTRY Three.
HAPPY is such a good feeling. But are you really happy even when you are?
From the two-faced girl who decided to come out from her unhappy comfort zone for just a day. The girl who tried staying happy for just ONE DAY.
- It’s a beautiful morning and today, I am happy. Did you think that I’m always grumpy? Did you think that I’ll always have that weird look on my face and in my dressing which clearly states “Do not disturb.”
Ah! Well, you’re wrong. Today I’m feeling so positive that I have decided that I’ll spend my day making others happy and brighten someone else’s mood. Yes, that is what I’m going to do today.
It’s a beautiful morning but I don’t feel like it and that’s why I’m pretending to be happy. Do you know why? Because, I’m tired of staying sad and negative all the time. I know things are going to remain just the way they want and no matter how hard I try nothing is going to ever change. It’s all in my head. This sad feeling is what breaking my heart. But yes, today, I won’t show it. I won’t show it to anyone and let them even not worry about me for one day and just remain happy. And that’s why today, I’m going to make everyone smile; because deep down, I myself can’t.
- “Thank you so much girl. You truly are a gem of person. May god bless you with all the happiness.” the tired old lady said to me with a warm smile when I helped her. “Oh god sure must since you’ve blessed me.” I said replying with a similar kind of smile. “He sure will. After all, you’re a beautiful soul.” she said and then went on her way. She called me a beautiful soul. I should definitely spread my nameless acts of kindness and affection because I believe that it makes my soul soar high. I like it that way. I really do.
“Thank you so much girl. You truly are a gem of person. May god bless you with all the happiness.”the tired of old lady said to me with a warm smile when I helped her. “Oh god sure must since you’ve blessed me.” I said replying with a similar kind of smile. “He sure will. After all, you’re a beautiful soul.” she said and then went on her way. Oh poor lady don’t you know that we can’t get everything in this world? Haven’t you realised all these years of living that life isn’t entirely a beautiful place to live in? That not everyone around who help you will have a beautiful soul? Definitely not me. I don’t have a beautiful soul. I don’t have a beautiful mind like you pre-assumed. I’m a negative being who just covers up her negativity by acting “nice” with other people. You never went inside my head and figured out my thoughts. You never will. And you shouldn’t.
- “Oh my god you’re such a sweetheart.We missed your old self. Please do remain like this forever. We love the happy you.” he said to me. Yes, I love how I made them smile. See the way they’re laughing and shining so beautifully? Yes, I’m the reason and I, am so proud of myself. Making someone else happy makes me self content. Maybe I should be like this for many more days.
“Oh my god you’re such a sweetheart. We missed your old self. Please do remain like this forever. We love the happy you.” he said to me. Sorry. But I can’t stay happy forever. You don’t know my struggles and neither I know yours. We both know that nothing can make us happy for a life time because we are humans after all, and this attachment to worldly situations is what makes us mortals. We can’t change it. Sorry for saying such things but I do realise that you cannot listen to my inner voice. And that, is the best part.